But our Lord is good. He cares for us. Hard times help us grow. Or they harden us. I had to choose to let it grow me. This has been a time of loss for us. Loss of one of my best friends. Jocelyn. My beautiful dairy cow. She loved me. And I loved her. She was my quiet time. She was my rest. I spent a hr a day with her for 10 months of the year.
She blessed our family with calves. And milk. And fellowship for me. It was so hard to lose her. So hard. I tried everything I could. But in the end it wasn't enough. I disagreed with the vet. But my lack of experience made me listen to him. And in the end I think my diagnosis was right. But I'll never know.
What I do know is my heart hurts. She really was a great friend. I'll never forget her scent. I'll never forget her kisses. Her head nuzzles. Her stepping on my foot. ;) her tail knocking my glasses off while milking. Her perfect tasting milk. Her soft hide. Her curly hair on her head. Her running to me through the pasture when I called her. Her skipping around when she was extra happy. Her love of treats. Her cuddles in the pasture as we laid there together. And being with her nearly constantly for almost 2 weeks as I tried to save her life.
I miss having her. She was more than a pet and friend. She provided us with rich wonderful milk. And can't be fully replaced in any way.
The night before she calved this time I moved her to a smaller paddock. My Wisdom was standing on the gate as I moved her and fixed the fence. I walked over to her and smiled. She smiled back. Looked to Jocelyn and said "momma, Jocelyn is your baby, and I is your girl"
She melted my heart. She understood my love for my cow. And I'll never forget that moment. As the sun was going down. And we were admiring my Jocelyn.
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